The Real Question Is...

...what does it mean to be good? Not nice, not pleasant. Good.

I was talking with one of my buddies just a little bit ago, telling him, "I try to be a good guy." As soon as I said it, I realized that I didn't have any real idea what exactly I meant by that. I try to be kind to people I can hardly tolerate? I try to buy my friends fast food when I drive? I try to mostly stay out of people's way by not upsetting them? Sure, I do all these things, but does that really constitute goodness? The only answer that seems true is: no.

Goodness, I've been told, means that you do the hard thing. You have the conversation that no one wants to have because it's related to someone's health. I've also heard that it means never getting drunk. From what I can put together, goodness looks like a Baptist congregation. Not that I have anything against Baptists (I don't), but they seem to be fairly renowned for keeping-it-down. That just seems boring. While I know that goodness is not necessarily something that comes easy to Man, it must at least look somewhat fulfilling, right? And the angelic choir boy image is not, in the least, appealing. It's actually sort of annoying. So what, then, does it mean to be good? I mean, truly good. It can't comprise of a list of non-deeds. "I've never been in a fight,"; "I've never had sex,"; "I never drink more than I know I can hold." Wrong. Goodness can't be not being bad. It simply can't. Not being bad is simply that; not being bad. So, then, what? How does one live a life that can be called "good?"

It must be a matter of alignment of heart. Intent to bless and lift up is good, while flying under the radar to not piss people off is just not bad. Right? But how do I align my heart so that I might consistently be a source of love and comfort to my brother? What does that heart even look like? It can't be the heart that just sits around and feels worthless everytime it violates a commandment. That's just an over stimulated guilt complex. If we sat around and thought about how often we screwed up, it would be a lonely life. A lonely, unforgiven life. So goodness must be a turning towards something else. Not a turning away from. It's looking at the past, and turning towards repentance. I suppose that's the key to goodness: repentance. If repentance is turning the heart toward God, it must be. So why do we only wait until we feel that we've transgressed far enough to make that final leap to God's forgiving grasp. Are we not, at all times, fallen creatures? Are we not creatures who always need constant reminding of his good, most loving heart? But how does this realignment with God's forgiving heart manifest itself practically? How? What does it look like?

I don't want to be a nice guy - they finish last - I want to be a good man, repectable and kind.

How?